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Raising A Conscious Child by Denise Yeargin – Parent, Elementary School Counselor

This feature article by Denise Yeargin comes from a lifetime of unique experience. Find out from a parent who has a Masters degree in counseling, works currently as an elementary school counselor and served children and families for years as a Unity minister.  Read her thoughts about:

RAISING CONSCIOUS CHILDREN

There are many books and articles in our world today in regards to raising children.  So when I was asked if I would be interested in writing an article that would be on Bunny Hull’s website, I was truly motivated.  My experiences with children range from teaching music and creating dramatic productions with private school students and legally blind students at a state school, to being a professional school counselor with students from Preschool through the 8th grade.   I also was a music minister in a small Unity church in the late 1990’s, and used many of Bunny’s songs with children as we created portions of Sunday Services that were always as exciting for the students as they were for the adults who were listening.  Of course let’s not leave out the fact that I am the mother to two amazing young men who are in their teens and I was the minister of a Unity Church in Old Hickory, Tennesse for about 10 years.

I truly believe that children come into our universe much more “conscious” than the adults that already inhabit the planet. Children have not yet beenTwo boys with globe programmed by the world.  They are much more in tune to their feelings as a guidance system; however they are not able to take full responsibility for their own wellbeing, therefore, it does not take long for their self esteem to be wounded, their consciousness scarred.  So in answer to the question – how do we raise conscious children, I believe the answer is simple –  we remain conscious ourselves.  Sound easy?  I don’t know about you – but that is easier said than done.

I am in the process of writing a book that will accompany a cd of songs that my life partner, Judy Blackwelder has written to go along with the process. The book will be entitled Destined 4 Joy.  I have spent most of my life knowing how to be consciously joyful and unfortunately have allowed people, places, things or situations to steal that joy from me.  Every time that has occurred, I have gotten angry with myself because I “should” know better.  We all know what shoulding on ourselves gets us.  At 54 years young , I have finally learned to cut myself a bit of slack and realized that my moments of anger at others are becoming much shorter and my stints of consciousness are growing longer and stronger every day.  So I share with you the 4 things I believe help me attempt to stay conscious.  These are the same 4 things I have attempted to teach my sons and the students that I have worked with over the years.

  • Slow Down
  • Get Real Be Real Stay Real
  • Put Your Whole Self In
  • Show Up Pay Attention Tell the Truth Don’t Get Attached to the Outcome
  • Slow Down

We live in such a fast paced world.  We run from place to place and we even encourage our children to live the same fast pace.  Do more, try it all, be all that you can be.  Of course what kind of a parent would not want their children to be all that they can be?  The problems begin to mount up when the being all you can be stands in the way of having a childhood or living, loving and learning together in a family system.

When I was in elementary school there was a great song that I remember singing in a talent show called “Feelin’ Groovy.”  The beginning words were, slow down, you move too fast – you’ve got to make the moments last just kickin’ down the cobblestones, lookin’ for fun and feelin’ groovy.”  Sound familiar?  Some of you reading this may even remember the song.  I actually remember days like that – days when I just was able to run barefoot through the grass, climb trees, play kick ball in the street, sell lemonade on the corner, and help my momma dry the dishes after supper.  How many children in our society today get to experience any of these things?

I have many friends whose children go from school to soccer practice and ballet and private piano lessons and scouts etc. etc. etc.  Now don’t get me wrong,Children reflecting my children did take Tai Kwon Do and they are both in the Marching Band.  Those things have brought the entire family lots of joy watching and being involved in.  I think finding those things that are really important that can fit into your family’s routine and not completely take away all the collective family time are great.  Children still need to find time to spend at home eating supper with their parents, playing a game of Uno – something.  A slower, more gentle pace would give everyone time to create more of a conscious family life.

Get Real Be Real Stay Real

I work in a public school system, and although I enjoy what I do, I realize that within the system we are still attempting to create little clones of the “perfect child”.  I am in hopes everyday that as a school counselor, I have the ability to assist every child in finding those things that are “unique” to them.  As a Unity Minister, I teach young and old alike that there is a spark of divinity within every one of us.  That spark is a part of our oneness and also that thing that makes us distinctively us.

I am constantly reminded of one of my favorite children’s stories, the Velveteen Rabbit.  Within that story is a passage that has stuck with me for years.  The Skin Horse tells the rabbit that real has nothing to do with how you are made, but real happens when someone really loves you and then you become real.  What I know about many of our children and us is that we have been hurt and so we don’t allow someone to really get close enough to us to love us —  truly love us.  If I am going to get real, I first have to love myself enough to be myself and then secondly I have to remember to be that real self in each and every situation.  The staying real happens over time with practice.  —  Which leads me right into the next step.

Child reading intentlyPut Your Whole Self In

When I finally know who I am and show up real to people, places and things, I then can put that whole real self into any situation.  It is very tiring walking around attempting to figure out who can accept me as I am and who cannot.  When we are doing that we are not putting our whole beautiful God self into any situation.  I see children every day that are holding back.  They aren’t raising their hands for fear of having the wrong answer; they aren’t stepping into sports, or music, or other activities for fear of not being good enough.  Sound familiar?  When we as their parents and teachers and guardians model those behaviors to them – when we say things like I really wanted to be an artist but I chose to go into accounting because I could make more money –  what kind of message are we giving our children.  We are teaching them to do what the world wants them to do.

When I make choices to do what someone else wants me to do, I never really put my whole self in.  It is when I begin to listen to my heart and make sure my mind and my heart and my gut are in alignment with my decisions that I am able to put my whole self in.  Remember playing the Hokey Pokey?  Remember how much fun it was to put your whole self in and then to shake your whole self all about?  Isn’t that truly what life is all about?  Ask yourself in this moment, how different would my life be right now, If I had stepped into what made my heart sing when I was 20 years old?  Then and only then can I be in integrity with who I have come here to be.

Show Up –  Pay Attention – Tell The Truth – Don’t Get Attached to the Outcome

This is a powerful little process that I learned from several different sources.  Just google it and see all the references.  Now after you do that – begin to try it.  Show up.  Sound simple enough?  How many times do we make excuses in our lives and not show up or even do what we said we would do?  Do we think that our children don’t know that?  I have raised two Unity children from babies and they call me on my stuff continuously.  “Momma, you said….”  If we want to live a conscious life, we’ve got to begin by showing up first. Then there is pay attention.

How many of us say those words to our children many times each day.  I know as a teacher and counselor I have said those same words to many students, andStephanie and Boy with Magic Circle then I find myself walking through my day, not really paying attention to what a student is saying to me because I think what I am doing is much more important than anything they might be saying to me in that moment.  I know that many of us have been on the receiving end of that one and know how it feels to be ignored.  But the thing I want us all to hear is that this one little step is much deeper than that.  Many times what a small child has to say to us is much more profound and just the thing we need in that moment than any book, any tv program etc.  Try it for just one week and see how your life shifts.  Pay attention to the people, situations and things around you and see what you learn not only about them, but about yourself.

Tell the Truth –  well isn’t that a fine howdy do.  I know that we all would agree that we need to tell the truth.  How often do we find ourselves stretching the truth in order not to hurt someone; or telling what we call a little white lie?  And again this step is much deeper than that.  Telling the truth means that each step I take is in alignment with who I am as a person – who I have come here to be.  When I make those decisions throughout my day that are out of integrity with who I am, I am only putting myself on a path that I don’t really want to travel on.  And then somewhere during the next few days or months,  I always begin to blame someone else for the things that begin to happen in my life, when the actually I created them by not being my true self – not really telling the truth.   What is your truth?  Are you standing in it daily at home, at work, at play?  What about with each decision you make?

When I am willing to do the first three things, show up, pay attention, and tell the truth, then most of the time I am truly not attached to the outcome.  That one can be hard when we are not truly living our lives for ourselves, but living them for someone else or through someone else.  I will never have the life I truly want as long as I am not showing up as the person I came here to be   So – you say –  I thought this article was about raising Conscious Children.  This sounds like work for the adults.  And the answer is yes!  Yes – if we have children that are not living consciously where do we think they learned to live that way?   We must look in the mirror and have a long talk with ourselves.  What have I modeled to them – when I am not being conscious throughout my day –  when am I not present for them when they need me?

Raising conscious children is the only thing that will save our planet.  We as adults have created many messes that have had to be cleaned up by ourselves and by others.  If we want our children and our children’s children to make better, more conscious decisions in the future –  we must begin with us.  We must be the change that we want them to see, hear, feel and experience.   You are destined for a life of love, joy and peace.  It is really a simple, easy process of being conscious.  What will you choose?  What will you choose for your child?

Namaste’

Denise

You can be inspired by Denise by going to www.inspired-experiences.com

Denise Yeargin is a native of Nashville, Tennessee and at a very early age began singing, dancing, playing the piano, and acting.  Her undergraduate degree is in Vocal and Piano Performance with a minor in Drama.  She was the Music/Drama Specialist at Ezell Harding Christian School in Antioch Tennessee for 5 year – before deciding to take a deeper look at herself.

Denise entered graduate school and completed a Master’s Degree in Counseling Psychology.  At that time she became the Guidance Counselor at Tennessee School for the Blind.  She did Family and Children’s counseling for Woodmont Hills Counseling Center and was an adjunct professor for Trevecca Nazarene University in Nashville, TN.  During that same time she found Unity, and was a part of the praise and worship team for First Church Unity in Nashville.   After marrying and having two children she found a smaller Unity church closer to where she was living  and began attending.  On the second week there, she was asked to consider the Music Minister Position, which she held from 1997 – 2002.

In 2002, the minister there became ill and moved to Florida.  Denise had been working towards becoming a licensed Unity teacher and was getting ready to enter the Leadership Training portion.  At that time the Association of Unity Churches spoke to Denise and she was asked to be the “Spiritual Leader” of Unity Church for Positive Living.   Denise continued on her path as a teacher and counselor and entered the Field Licensing Program to become and Ordained Unity Minister.

Denise was ordained in March of 2009.  She continued with UCPL for about another year.  In August 2010, Denise resigned as the minister of UCPL and stepped back into the realm of professional school counselor.  She is a Pennington Elementary School which is part of the McGavock Cluster in Nashville.  She is the proud mother of two teenage sons who march in the McGavock Marching Band.   Her oldest son will graduate the school year and is looking to enter MTSU on a Band Scholarship.

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Raising A Conscious Child by Amy Arnaz – Mother, Ballet School Director

30 years as owner and director of the Boulder City Ballet School in Boulder City, Nevada provided the opportunity for Amy Arnaz to affect the lives of hundreds of children and young adults. Motherhood and a background in dance make for a unique and rich perspective on raising children.  Find out what Amy knows about:


Raising A Conscious Child

By Amy Arnaz

I remember being one year old, still in my crib, and understanding what the adults around me were saying.  My parents never spoke baby talk to me.  They spoke in full sentences and interacted with me as if I understood them — and I did.  I clearly remember walking into the kitchen in my footed pajamas after just learning to walk and straightening out the carpet in front of the kitchen sink.  My mother thanked me.  She wore a dress and an apron and had oatmeal cooking on the stove.  I remember being hungry that morning.  Mom reconfirmed this memory with me later in life because she was impressed that a little girl would take notice of a crooked carpet.

 

Looking back on the carpet-straightening moment and many other moments I remember vividly from my early childhood,  I was inspired to always be as present as possible, inwardly, while raising my daughter and while working with hundreds of children for 30 years in a dance studio I owned.  During those years I always gathered my little dancers together before each class so we could say hello to each other.  Sitting in a circle on the floor, my favorite question to them was:  Do you remember being in your crib?

 

That question may not seem the most apropos way to begin a ballet lesson for children as young as three years old, but the answers were astounding.  There were many yes answers with explanations that I would later verify with the parents.  Did Mary really have a mobile hanging above her crib with stars on it?  Could Susie really see her brother sleeping in a twin bed next to her crib?  Did Lisa really have a rocking horse named Cookie Brownie?  Did she really learn her colors from the colors on the dress of her Raggedy Ann doll?

I remember standing in my crib, which was immediately next to a window with a view into the back yard, and seeing my reflection in the window.  I screamed with fear thinking someone was looking at me from outside — my first remembrance of fear.  Mom explained it was a reflection and even then, so young, I understood.  With so much evidence pointing to children’s innate awareness, I have dedicated myself to nurturing this awareness in them to give them a chance to STAY aware and not fall into a state of psychic slumber.  I’m one person of thousands these children will interact with.  But it only takes one spark to start a raging fire — a Spiritual Fire.

 

“Wake up!” — my parental motto.  Always snapping my fingers to awaken my own daughter when I saw her daydreaming, carried over to snapping my dance students awake during class.  It is so easy to drift off under the blanket of sleep and only a constant reminder to wake up will give a child the tools to one day jolt themselves awake.

 

To be alert, to keep our minds where our bodies are, to remember ourselves, are basic inner-life concepts that even very young children can comprehend.  They love being snapped awake!  To them it becomes a fun game and they enjoy it.  They understand the difference between being awake and asleep.  Many times a little person caught me asleep and giggled after saying, “Wake up Miss Amy!”  A slightly humiliating experience for any adult but that humiliation is outweighed by the ultimate reward of knowing that little child was conscious enough to see MY sleep and snap me awake.  Thank you little ones.

 

Why not plant these ideas in children so that later in life, when they are driving a car at 70mph down the freeway, they are less likely to drift off into a daydream and not remember driving the last 10 miles? In awareness is safety. What better lesson to give any child than teaching them about awareness?  Yes, proper execution of a pirouette and a grand jete’ are essential lessons in ballet class, but adding awareness on top of that is icing on the cake.

 

For me, the first step in Raising A Conscious Child, is to notice them asleep and with a snap of my fingers and a cheery voice say, “wake up!”  They’re smart.  They feel the contrast between being gone in a daydream/unconscious stupor versus the energy and brightness of being snapped into a state of awareness.  My dance students loved my description of being “gone” as being in Lala Land. With the world going a million miles an hour in all directions, with electronics that steal children’s souls, with sleep dominating most everyone, it is imperative to share Right inner-life principles with children.  We, as adults who are trying to be conscious, are their first line of defense against the tsunami of sleep that is awaiting them IF they don’t have the rescue of Awareness in their Spiritual Toolkit.

 

Love the Light and Remember Yourself,

Amy Arnaz

www.themagictutu.typepad.com

 

Biography

I grew up in Las Vegas and received my initial 10 years of ballet training from Christina Carson.  I met Bunny Hull in ballet class when we were 7 years old and we have remained friends our entire lives.  After summer study at the Joffrey School in NYC and dancing with the San Diego Ballet Company and Nevada Dance Theatre, I opened my own ballet school in Boulder City, NV and owned it for almost 30 years.  My husband, Desi Arnaz Jr., and I purchased and renovated the Historic Boulder Theatre which was built in 1933.  The theatre is now home to non-profit Boulder City Ballet Company which Desi and I founded in 1997. Besides dedicating her life to her ballet students, Amy also works with the Las Vegas Valley Humane Society in their TNR program (trap-neuter-release) to control the feral cat colonies living in our neighborhood.  She has one daughter, Haley, who also loves ballet.  She loves working with children and living in small town America with 5 cats and their scruffy dog, Jelly.

In the featured photo:  Amy and daughter, Haley

 


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A Look In The Mirror – Why I Became A Writer by Bunny Hull

Grammy Award winning songwriter Bunny Hull reflects on how she was guided into a career as a songwriter and singer and talks about what keeps her going.

From the moment I wrote my first song at age fifteen I was hooked.  I had been learning to dance since age three, playing the piano since age seven and singing since I was old enough to talk.  All this was entirely due to my mom, who showed me what it meant to  experience arts, arts, arts.  So I’d been singing and playing for a while and nobody told me the next thing I should do was write a song, but going through my teens was somewhat trying.  I guess anyone going through their teens is experiencing a lot of stuff: like getting to know yourself, wondering how you fit it, or in my case being the daughter of parents divorcing and having your first broken heart.  Sheesh, what was I supposed to do with all that information?

I had to write.  It was my therapy.  Thank God, something in me wanted to put my thoughts to paper.  So that’s what I began doing at fifteen -never knowing that all these years later writing would be one of the things for which I live and breathe.  I LOVE to write.  I love writing music, lyrics, articles, curriculum…pretty much anything.  Can you tell?

Mom was a professional singer from the big band era with a gorgeous smoky voice and beautiful face to match.  Her professional name was Jeri Keever. I always thought she looked like a young Betty Grable. I kind of sound like her.  I always had a lot of smoke in my voice.  Little did I know at fifteen that I would be following in her footsteps and become a singer, hired by many for the breathy quality I inherited from mom.  And that I would end up working with people like Quincy Jones, David Foster, Anita Baker, Christopher Cross, Billy Idol, Michael Jackson and a bunch of others.  Yes, singing has always also been my passion.  It’s hard not to love it.  Who’s blessed enough to find two things for which they are ultimately inspired?  I guess me.  I’ve got a lot for which to be grateful.

There’s something about writing, though, that makes my spirit fly.  You know you’ve found your passion when that happens.  It pretty much has always felt effortless to me.  It’s always come easy.  Like most songwriters I would write ideas on napkins and bits of paper, take them back to the studio and make something out of them.  It’s that spark you get when you know you have an idea that means something – a phrase, a title, a little melody that sticks in your head, something that says it a little differently. It’s not good enough, though just to have an idea, you have to work with it, turn it inside out and every which way but loose – make it really mean something. You have to put in whatever time it takes to finish it.  It doesn’t always come out all at once.  When that happens it’s a gift!  It does happen -but not always.  Then once you write a song you have to record it , dance with it and massage it until you know it’s finished.  Someone asked me once “how do  know when a song’s finished?”  My reply was “you just know.”  Something inside you says “that’s it.” And I have to say it’s the best feeling in the world when you’ve finished a song you feel good about.

My career as a songwriter has taken me on some pretty wonderful journeys.  One of the greatest was probably winning a Grammy for co-writing New Attitude,

which Patti LaBelle recorded for Beverly Hills Cop.  Then there was a Dove Award for LeAnn Rimes version of Ready For A Miracle from Evan Almighty. Not every song was a hit song, but there have been lots of incredible writers I’ve collaborated with along the way like Brenda Russell and Diane Warren. I still recall Diane and I writing in her fabulous funky little Hollywood Blvd. office space so many years ago.  My first song I ever had recorded by an artist was sung by…Donny Osmond.  Then after my cult hit with Angel of the Night by Angela Bofill, I broke through with an album by Stacy Lattisaw co-written with Narada Michael Walden.  Let Me Be Your Angel was my first top ten song. Thank you Narada!

Now that I’ve transitioned from mainstream pop music to other genres like children’s music and books, the process stays just as exciting and fresh to me.  It’s just as thrilling to get an idea and work it to fruition.  And I get just as much pleasure writing curriculum for children and finding the ideas that will resonate in their little hearts and minds.

I don’t know if I’ll ever totally be finished writing a good mainstream song with a message, but in the meantime I follow my bliss and it leads me to beautiful places with people I love, admire and respect.  What more could anyone want from life?  I must confess  however, there is still more I have in mind.

My whole life thus far has been me – using the gifts I’ve been given to touch others – to make a difference by writing something or singing a song.  No wonder that my entire life, right now, revolves around being able to give that same experience to children.  To teach them that they have gifts to share – a lot of different gifts that live inside them.  You’re never too young to learn how to use those gifts.

I became a writer because I had to.  Everything inside my heart and mind wanted me to.  If you have a gift  – use it.  Use it with all you’ve got.  There’s no one in the whole world that can give that gift the way you can.  Using your gift, in your circle of influence no matter how large or small will affect the world in ways you’ll never know.

Enjoy the journey – LOVE.  Life is for giving.

Peace,

Bunny

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“A Story Of Hope And Friendship For One Kenyan Orphan” – Children’s author Pam Bitterman talks about her creative process.

When you were a child did you ever have moments when you decided that you were going to be a writer when you grew up?

*I was a happy dreamer as a child. My mother always lovingly told me that she believed that I would someday be a writer. She originally thought that I would write children’s books. Even though my first books were not of that genre, they were still the result of her early influence. She and my father instilled in me the notion that I could be and do anything I put my mind and heart to. In fact, my first published book is a direct result of that enduring faith. For 25 years, my parents kept the letters, journal entries and official documents that I sent home from my first leap out into the big world. Their sincere belief was that I would someday commit what turned out to be that fantastic adventure to print. And so I did, in my book Sailing To The Far Horizon; The Restless Journey and Tragic Sinking of a Tall Ship. Later, I wrote another nonfiction account, this one of a more recent adventure, my solo journey to both live and work in Africa. That book is titled Muzungu. That same experience also gave birth to my children’s book, When This Is Over, I Will Go To School, And I Will Learn To Read; A Story of Hope and Friendship for One Young Kenyan Orphan, the subject of this interview.

 

If you didn’t write as a child, then when did you start writing and what inspired you to start?

*I began writing for my own children, actually. The fantastic experience that had brought their father and I together and had influenced their lives in far reaching ways that they might never otherwise realize was the impetus for my committing my first book to print. Of the legions of wayfarers who shared in our incredible experience, only a handful were present at the end, and survived to tell the tale. In the quarter century since, no one had. I feared that no one ever would. And so it fell to me.

How do you choose the topics for your books?

The topics of my books seem to choose me. I write when I cannot help it. I write because I have something I feel needs to be said. If my heart wasn’t in it, it would be a much more difficult endeavor for me. In that respect, I guess I am quite lucky. Consequently, I rarely suffer from writers block. Just the opposite, in fact!

What kinds of things inspire you to write?

Life inspires me to write. Life, and happiness, and sadness, and good and bad fortune, and questions that need asking but may never find answers. I write from my heart. Of course, to write for children is then a natural evolution of that process. The homily, Child, You Are Miracle that was published by World Vision, was inspired by a recent natural disaster that left thousands of children abandoned and alone. The writing poured out of me in a matter of minutes. It was meant to be a lifeline cast out to children who felt they had lost everything and had nowhere to turn and no reason to hope. It was a promise of the innate strength and beauty that is inherent in each and every one of them, and the hope that, at the risk of losing all else, if they can hold onto the certainty of their own individual magical special gift, perhaps they could feel safe.

Have any of your books earned special recognition?

When This Is Over, I Will Go To School, And I Will Learn To Read, has been nominated and is presently being considered for several awards! Fingers crossed. Any attention brought to the plight of these children is potentially life saving.

Have any of your stories been inspired by real people or events?

*So far, real people and events inspire all of my stories. I have written primarily nonfiction. Real human stories and actual events that need to be exposed, explored, examined, and/or simply enjoyed are my inspiration both for how I live my life, and subsequently how I immortalize those experiences in print. I would like my writing to make a difference. This is particularly and poignantly true in the case of my children’s book that is the subject of this interview.

Do you do school visits, if so what question do children ask you most?

I would love to do school visits for this currently published children’s book! I have worked extensively both personally and professionally with children throughout my lifetime. I have taught, and I have been fortunate enough to be a credentialed instructor in the Junior Great Books program. And my newly published children’s book is, I sincerely believe, very special. It is a true story, told in the voice of one very real little boy, and he speaks for all the children of Kenya. This book is unique in that it is entirely the product of my personal experience, the photographs were taken by me while I worked and lived in Africa, and the illustrations for the book were done by the village youngsters in a tiny school on the grounds of the project where I lived. I would ask them to draw me a picture of “mother”, or of “family” or of “love” or “what frightens them” or “what they hope for in life.” Their responses are a window into a vastly separate reality. With this story, a teacher (or a parent) can share with a classroom (or a child) a wonderful warm, human story, have an educational experience, learn a new language – there are simple Swahili words with their English translations interspersed throughout the story – open their little hearts and eyes and minds, relate to this very lovable protagonist and his family, and make a charitable donation, all in one fell swoop. 100% of my proceeds from the sale of this book are promised to the children who created the illustrations for it. They trust me, and they wait.

Has anyone ever written you a fan letter that you’d like to share?

Yes, I am honored to say that I have received many of which I am very proud. One in particular that I’d like to share was this one: “After I closed your book Pam, I was left with the strong unyielding sense that I needed to be more, see more, feel more, do more with my life.”

 

About the author:

Pamela Bitterman lives in San Diego, California.  Her first book, Sailing To the Far Horizon, her own story of life, loss, and survival at sea is graphically biographical. It encapsulates the author as product of the first thirty years of her life.

Muzungu, the story of the author’s unlikely escapades throughout Kenya, picks up on that journey a couple decades later.

She has also written a children’s book titled When This Is Over, I Will Go To School, And I Will Learn To Read; A Story of Hope and Friendship for One Young Kenyan Orphan. Finally, the author has penned a homily entitled, Child, You Are Miracle. Links to these, plus trailers to her three published books can be found on her website: www.pamelasismanbitterman.com

Bitterman’s writing has emerged amidst her travels, adventures, and finally her marriage and children, her persona as wife and mother – the heart of her; the author as her best self.

Her future remains to be seen, and to be told.

 

 

 

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Should I (and How Do I) Hire a Tutor? By Timothy Hall

School has been in session now for several months.  Students are busy learning their ABC’s, new vocabulary words, writing skills and math skills.  Teachers are busy assessing each student’s progress by observing learning styles and test results.  Inevitably questions must be asked of every student’s ability and achievements, including:

Are they at grade level?

Are they mastering new techniques for learning?

Are they understanding and comprehending new material?

Perhaps your child is performing well in most subjects.  But, if you’re like the majority of parents, your child is behind in one or more subjects or could use a little “refreshing” of concepts and applications.   If your little star is to succeed and keep up with their classmates (and California State Standards) it may be time to consider getting some extra help.

There are several resources available to parents who wish to improve their child’s skills in learning new material (or re-learning older material).  Learning centers such as Sylvan, Huntington and Mathnasium are most likely in your neighborhood or within a short driving distance.  They typically charge by the hour and usually recommend lots of sessions, depending on what your child needs help with. You can also buy “packages” of sessions at a discount so don’t be afraid to ask about this option.

Learning centers may want to test your child before recommending a tutoring package.  There are fees associated with these tests in addition to the tutoring fees.  I have a simple rule when considering utilizing learning centers: do your own homework and research and ask questions.  Go and visit a learning center in your area.  Ask if you can just observe for a half-hour or so.  Check online (just Google the name of the learning center), ask other parents, ask teachers – the more information you have the better!

While most learning centers advertise the “one-on-one” tutoring benefit, don’t be surprised to see a classroom setting in the center. There may be single desks or workstations.  Students may receive some “one-on-one” tutoring and also receive small group tutoring.  Both of these can work for your child if they’re able to focus.  There will be distractions from other students working with other tutors, people coming and going in and out of the centers, and books and papers being ruffled.  For some students these stimuli simply aren’t a bother.  But for others they can be a huge distraction.

Another resource for struggling students (and their parents) is the private tutor.  Private tutors may work for tutoring companies or be self-employed.  They typically meet students in the student’s home or public place, such as a library.   They may be high-school or college students or even a certified teacher earning some extra money.  Finding and hiring a private tutor is not difficult.  However you want to be proactive and, just like working with learning center tutors, you want to do your own research and ask questions.

The tutoring industry has exploded in the last 5 – 10 years.  One of the causes of this growth has been the No Child Left Behind Act that was passed into law in 2002.  In simple terms the NCLB Act requires any school that receives federal funds to meet standardized testing scores in order to continue receiving those funds.   Within the parameters of meeting these “standards” is the opportunity for students of a struggling school to receive free tutoring.  With so many struggling schools required to offer free tutoring to its students, a multitude of tutors was needed.  This spurred the growth of Supplemental Education Service providers, companies set-up to specifically tutor under the NCLB Act.   It is these companies that desperately needed tutors.  As with any industry there are some great SES providers and some not-so-great providers.

Hiring a private tutor (outside of the SES provider route) is an easy process – if you take the time to do a little research.  Ask your friends and colleagues for recommendations.  A simple Google search of “tutor” will produce lots of prospects.  Visit each company’s website.   Do they specialize in a specific subject?  Do they offer one-on-one tutoring or group tutoring?  Do they come to your house? How do they hire their tutors?  What qualifications are important to you?  By the way, it’s not important that the tutor has a doctorate degree or a master’s degree.  There are plenty of wonderful tutors out there without these credentials.  You also don’t need a tutor from an Ivy League school.  Having a doctorate from a prestigious school doesn’t necessarily translate into a great tutor for your child.

Whether you choose a learning center, an SES provider, or a private tutor it’s important to be involved.  Do your homework and ask questions.  Be prepared to discuss money too (unless you’re hiring an SES provider as they are paid by the SES companies directly). You’ll find a whole range of hourly rates – averaging from $20 to $100 per hour.   You’ll need to pre-determine your budget, planning for at least one tutoring session per week at minimum.  You should also think about how long each session should be and how many weeks or months you would like your child to be tutored.  For children under the age of 8 years I recommend sessions of 30 minutes to an hour;  for children older than 8 up to 1 ½ hours.  You will need to monitor sessions to see how your child is doing and when he/she is losing their focus.  You’ll know when it’s time to stop.

So what should you look for when you hire a tutor?  The goal is to help your child improve their understanding and knowledge.  Obviously you want someone who knows and understands the material to be tutored.  However, you want more than someone who can add numbers together or spell a word or write a sentence.  You want someone who can teach these things to your child.  It’s one thing to know how to do something; it’s quite another to know how to teach it.   That requires an understanding of how we learn.  The ancient Greek philosopher, scientist and physician said it best, “Those that know, do.  Those that understand, teach.”  Look for a tutor who “connects” with your child.   You may have to try a few tutors before finding the right fit.  It will be worth it, however, in the long run.  Your child will feel more confident, increase his/her self-esteem and excel at school.  Tutoring is an investment, and every investment requires its own due diligence.

Tim Hall lives in Los Angeles and is a tutor who works with children and students of all ages (1st – 12th grade).  He is CBEST certified and is pursuing his Math Education degree and credentials. For more information on Tim or if you have any tutoring questions,  you may contact him at tim@timstutoring.com.


 

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Naudain Academy, a Montessori School, uses the Young Masters Little Wisdom Discovery Program to teach friendship.

What is a Young Master?  Someone born with gifts.  A Young Master is YOU.  This is what each and every child in the extension program at Naudain Academy is learning.  They are indeed Young Masters.  This week they continued to explore friendship as they reviewed  the Secret of The Heart they are focusing on for the first month.  They began as always.

“Let’s stand and say the Young Masters Pledge,” said Stephanie Pelly, the program’s director.  Proudly they stood with peace sign over their hearts and said  the pledge with and without the CD.   “I promise to use my gifts every day, in every way, for I am a Young Master.  The children already remember the pledge and state it with great enthusiasm.” said Stephanie. “With each meeting they understand a little more, what it means.”

They reviewed the book they read at their first meeting.  Many children recalled not only the title of the book  The Friendship Seed, but  were also able to share the author’s name, Bunny Hull and the illustrator Kye Fleming.  They discussed the names of the characters in the story and she then asked them if they could remember, “what was the Friendship Seed that was shared in the story…who can tell me?” she asked.  Together the children cheered – a smile.

They talked about how plants and flowers grow transition from a tiny seed and  how a friendship can grow from one single smile.  They talked about how it’s important to take care of our friendships, to nurture them and they explored how to do that.  Together the class created a “friendship flower.” On each petal they wrote an idea that could help their friendships grow in school.  They could “be kind”, one child said,  “and say kind words.” Another child said, “I could help a friend or cheer a them up if they were sad.”  They  talked about how they could “include others,” or “share with a friend.”  “What about unkind words,” asked Stephanie. ” Those are like weeds that don’t help friendships grow,” they all agreed. “We don’t want those in our garden!”

Stephanie then invited one child at a time to come to the front of the classroom and hold a “friendship flower”, this was a beautiful red rose that she had brought to class.  Each child said something they liked about their friend, until everyone had a turn.  This activity made each child feel that what they had to say was indeed important and valued. They were showing kindness to their friend.

The children were given an activity sheet to take away so they could complete their own friendship flower at home and discuss it with their families. The Young Masters Journals were introduced for the  first time.   The children were excited about receiving their new books which will allow them to track their journey of discovery as they learn how to use the Secrets of the Heart.

Before the program ended they listened to new songs from the Friendship Seed CD and sang THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE in English and Swahili, which they learned was the language of Kenya.  Finally they listened to Hey Young Masters and played air guitar as began to learn the words. “The music is one more important way the children begin to grasp the very important concepts they’re learning,” said Stephanie.

It was good day at Naudain today as the children moved one step closer to learning what powerful little beings they are and how their creativity as Young Masters can create a world of friendship, for them and for the world they live in.  They’re learning they make a difference.  Stay tuned for the next adventure as the children of Naudain Academy continue their quest to the Secrets of the Heart.

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The Dali Lama Speaks About Children And The Education Of The Heart

A recent quote by the Dalai Lama read, “My hope and wish is that one day, formal education will pay attention to what I call education of the heart. Just as we take for granted the need to acquire proficiency in the basic academic subjects, I am hopeful that a time will come when we can take it for granted that children will learn, as part of the curriculum, the indispensability of inner values: love, compassion, justice, and forgiveness.”

The time is here.  The time is now.

How do we learn to love and to be kind?  How do we learn the wisdom of gratitude and the awesome power that lies within our imagination and creativity?   We teach our children through modeling this behavior.  We teach them by using all means and methods available to us.  Dream A World and Dream A World Education, Inc. has created programs, books, music and curriculum that encourage children to remember the gifts they were given at birth – the secrets of the heart.  There are tools that exist to create a path for children to find out who they are and how they make a difference in the world.  These tools are being used in public schools, Montessori Schools, by home schoolers and by Spiritual Centers and Churches around the world.  The education of the heart is happening now.

Join our quest to teach all children –  the art of living.  One by one we change the world!

dreamaworld.com
www.dreamaworldedu.org

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Naudain Academy, a Montessori School, teaches children how important it is to have a vision.

Voorhees, New Jersey – Naudain Academy, a Montessori school, continued their quest this week to make sure their children have a well-rounded education by once again embarking on their journey to the Secrets of the Heart via the Young Masters Little Wisdom Discovery program which began in November.   The first day back at school from holiday vacation was right on target.  A brief conversation with three teachers on their lunch break about the holiday gifts children received revealed how so many gifts have to do with technology and that they usually require batteries or electricity and call for little use of imagination.  “How ironic,” Stephanie replied,  “that’s today’s lesson.  It’s all about imagination.  Something for which you don’t need batteries or electricity.”  They agreed that technology is important, but that nurturing a children’s creative play and imagination and encouraging children to understand  how powerful their imaginations are, is essential.  “Imagination is more important than knowledge,” said Albert Einstein.

After a very warm welcome from the children, they asked, “are we going to begin with the Young Masters pledge?”  “Of course,” Stephanie said, as  they all stood up and proudly shared the words.  “I promise to use my gifts everyday, in every way, for I am a Young Master. Peace!”  As the word peace resounds louder and louder each week, Stephanie realizes that their understanding of the gifts they are learning about is beginning to set in.

“Today there is another gift to discover, a new Secret of the Heart. Today we’ll  be reading a new book by Bunny Hull called The Magic Eye,” said Stephanie.  “Before I share the story,” she asked,  “does anyone know what a Magic Eye is?”  One child said, “my dreams,” another  said, “it’s when you see love!”  One little girl said, “it’s what you see at night when your eyes are closed.”  Revelations out of the mouths of babes.  “Brilliant ideas,” Stephanie said, as she pulled out the next Secret of The Heart.  “Your Magic Eye boys and girls is your imagination.  Artists use their Imagination when they create.  A story writer and song writer use their imagination when they think about the characters for their stories and words for their songs.  “Do you use your imagination?” Stephanie asked, ” do you use it on the playground or while you’re driving in the car with their parents?  How about when you’re deciding what to wear in the morning.”  “Yes!, the children said.”Can you use your imagination when we you’re laying in bed or feeling bored?  Does your imagination cost anything to use?”  “No,” they said, it’s free.  “What a powerful gift we have,” Stephanie said,  “and it doesn’t even cost anything to use.”

“Today Butaan and Phylos, the characters in the book, are going to teach us different ways they use their imagination,” said Stephanie,  and I think instead of me reading the book today we’re going to listen to Saphinne.  She’s the storyteller who reads the story on the CD.”  The children loved the story and were amazed how Phylos could use his imagination when he was afraid of the dark.  The children learned from the story that their imagination  is in their mind.   It’s the pictures you see and create in your mind.  It’s your Magic Eye.

After listening to the story and looking at the pictures, Stephanie put on some quiet music, turned off the lights and told the children that they were going to practice using their imagination, just as if they were laying in bed… in the dark.  The children closed their eyes and put their heads down.  After a few minutes Stephanie started to count backwards 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.  Then she asked the children to sit up and share what they saw with their Magic Eye.  “I was at the beach,” said one.  ” I was playing in the snow,” said another. ” I was laying in my bed under the covers and I was flying.”   “I imagined I was picking flowers”.  “How beautiful,” said Stephanie. “What wonderful imaginations you have!”

Stephanie asked the children if they could draw a picture about what they saw with their Magic Eye or write a story or create a song using their imagination.  They all agreed they could.   An activity for their journals to carry them through the week.

Stephanie told the children that each and every one of us is born with a Magic Eye and that they can use it at any time, anywhere for their whole life. “How about that!”

Next from the Young Masters Little Wisdom Discovery program the children learn about The Hidden Treasure.  What will be the next Secret of the Heart?  Stay tuned!

Visit Naudain Academy  at www.naudainacademy.com/

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Young Masters Little Wisdom Discovery Program Continues at Naudain Academy, a Montessori School

Voohees, New Jersey –  It was a rainy day and the children were ready for some indoor fun.  The theme of imagination continued on their favorite day, the day Stephanie comes to conduct the Young Masters Little Wisdom Discovery program .  As always Stephanie Pelly began with the Young Masters Pledge.  “I promise to use my gifts everyday, in every way, for I am a Young Master.”  As they reviewed what they had learned during the last class, the children remembered that their Magic Eye was –  inside their mind.  Stephanie asked, “when can you use your imagination?” “On a rainy day like this,” one little boy answered, “or when I’m laying in bed, driving in a car, at school or with my brother, sister or friend – anytime.” 

Today they played imagination games, beginning with The Magic Circle. One child at a time came up to the front of a classroom and began using their imagination to create something in the hula hoop.  One girl pretended the hula hoop was a mirror and she held it up to look at herself and strated to brush her hair.  Classmates took turns guessing what she was doing.  Another child pretended The Magic Circle was a garden of beautiful flowers.  One by one she picked a flower and brought it up to her nose to smell its fragrance.  Another young boy imagined he was typing on a computer. Even Stephanie took a turn, making a big snowball and throwing it at one of the children.  Lots of fun!

The second game they played was Magic Ball.  Stephanie used her imagination as she pretended to pull a magic ball out of her pocket.  She bounced it and tossed it in the air.  Finally, she called someone’s name and threw to them.  Using their imagination they caught the ball with both hands and passed it to a friend next to them.  The imaginary ball moved around the circle being rolled, tossed and thrown across the room even like a pitcher does in a baseball game.  Sometimes the ball grew really really big and sometime the magic ball became very small.  The children got a chance to stretch their power of imagination.

The last group activity for the day was story time.  Everyone worked together to create a story.  Stephanie began by holding up a microphone.  “Once upon a time,” she said.  The next child held the mic and continued, “There was a little boy.”  The story unfolded with each child speaking into the microphone to add their new idea.  It went something like this:  “A little boy was watching tv… and then he saw something on the news… he got scared and then went into his bedroom… and began dreaming…he dreamed about a door that was opening… and then he heard someone calling his name…he woke up only… to later hear his alarm clock ringing… he was just dreaming.”  The children cooperated by taking turns and their story was told.  “We all have a story to tell,” said Stephanie.

The program ended today by singing Thank You For Being Here and then they quietly laid their heads down to listen to some soft, gentle music.  This was one more opportunity to use their imaginations.

Stay tuned for our next Young Master LIttle Wisdom Discovery adventure.  See you next time!

Visit Naudain Academy  at www.naudainacademy.com/

 

 

 

 

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Seattle Center For Spiritual Living Talks About The Young Masters Little Wisdom Curriculum by Deanna Freeman

Seattle, Washington – At the Center for Spiritual Living in Seattle we serve a large and fluctuating population of children on Sundays during our 2 services in 6 different classes. We have adapted the curriculum through 5th grade, with the older kids helping to tell the stories to younger children. The ideas and principles presented also are used to inspire our middle school and teen curriculum along the same lines. We have been able to use each of the Secret of the Heart units for an entire month, sharing the story each week in different ways, utilizing the various menus of arts and crafts projects, worksheets and activities to support the week’s particular focus and added a few activities of our own. We’ve tied the unit into our annual theme and the monthly themes. For example, our 2012 Theme is “Heaven on Earth”. We began January’s monthly theme with “Appreciate the Good”, using “The Hidden Treasure” with its Secret of the Heart as Gratitude as our central

content and principle.  We use a consistent format for our order of activities, very similar to your listing, but shortened to handle each week’s actual time available for lessons.  I provide a monthly summary with an adult contemplation to help teachers prepare both in consciousness and spiritual practice as well as referencing the page numbers and activities to be covered.  Sometimes, we find and additional story related to the theme that we add on a 3rd or 4th Sunday.  February’s theme is “Be Courageous in Faith” utilizing “Heart of a Lion” and Courage as the Secret of the Heart.

I have found the Young Master’s Little Wisdom Series Books, CDs and curriculum inspiring, not only for the children but for the adults using it.  It has deepened everyone’s practice and understanding of principle in fun ways. It has encouraged our children to put their learning into practice in their daily lives and to share these ideas with friends and family.  Everyone especially loves the music!  As the Manager for Youth & Family Ministries at Center For Spiritual Living, Seattle and as a musician, educational consultant and curriculum writer, I find this series an excellent addition to our enriching programs.  I would highly recommend these books and CDs to parents and for spiritual centers like ours to use the curriculum in their programs, adapting them as needed to their particular population , resources and time guidelines.  For us, the six units provided six months of curriculum basics.

Deanna Freeman, RScP is Manager of Youth & Family Ministries, Center for Spiritual Living – Seattle.  Here she talks about how this center has incorporated the Young Masters Little Wisdom Curriculum to enhance the spiritual growth of the over 100 children per week they serve.

Visit Center For Spiritual Living Seattle by clicking here and find out how Rev. Kathianne Lewis, Senior Minister and Spiritual Leader of CSL Seattle, Deanna Freeman and their incredible team work together to make a difference in the world.